You see I consider myself pretty considerate and have always churn-out scenarios in my head before deciding on anything critical especially sensitive situations like weddings, funerals, birthdays, anniversaries etc.
Last night Pa (the other half's grandpa) sent him a birthday card. Attached to it was a $5/- note. I think the other half was rather upset by this as it was also Pa's birthday this month. He would rather that no money was sent across - it cheapened the whole idea of birthdays. I suppose the fact that $100/- were already in Pa's card didn't help the situation.
The trouble with old people is that they are afraid of dying poor even though their perception of wealth is only driven by their insecurities. Pa is not poor as his kids are millionaires. His net value will see him through another 15 years and he is already in his 90s. He could be holidaying in Spain if he wanted to but I guess his world is what he makes of it. Honestly, I think he grew up selfish and therefore can never change. The other half is well aware of my view on things. But I couldn't help seeing how sad he was at such a thoughtless act.
When Grandma was ill, he was quick to relinquish her to the home for he knew he could not cope. We were always very supportive of home care and have made an effort to ensure that the transition will not be a shock but always keeping home care as an option. We also offered to be a crutch throughout this process if Pa needed us.
For us, if we grew old we would want to be together and not separated by such human afflictions. I guess grandchildren are perceived differently than the assurances of your own kids. Families can be manipulative at times. The reason why having children can be a burden in itself. Too many sensitivities to consider rather than your own.
So today I am taking the other half shopping. Maybe some nice shirts for the trip might distract him from the nastiness of the world. Can money buy you happiness? Since Happiness is relative...you might have to dig deep to understand your need!
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2 comments:
There is a saying that I like:
Blessed are those who can give without remembering and take without forgetting.
Tell hubby that family can hurt you in ways that you can't imagine. Because you care about them a great deal.
Hopefully time can heal! New clothes help too!
It did...we bought loads of socks + tender loving care.
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